Smells Like Teen Spirit

First day of university in Ireland and unfortunately I still don't know how to tell the time, or maybe time is always lying to me, but I went to school for a ten o'clock class that was really at twelve, and then thought I had a class at one when it was really at two. So I ended up entering the lecture hall for my two o'clock class too early, sat down, and noticed only twenty other students. This should have been my first red flag. A jolly Irish fat professor struts in, and I ask you to emphasize the strut. Another red flag considering all the English professors tend to be thin and angry. But this guy stands before the class and says, "Welcome to the theatre." 

A big oh fucking shit instantly repeats through my mind. I cannot get up now in a lecture hall filled with only twenty other students, and considering my luck this professor would say something stupid like, "Where are you going?" And I did not want to be that student on the first day who says "I am in the wrong class." My skin gets too red when I am embarrassed and that risk is never worth it. So I remain frozen in my seat praying this class would be more of a theory class and less of an acting class. Of course the class I thought I would be missing was Enlightenment, which I think makes this lesson even more fascinating. Of course this theater class is an acting class, and I am about to faint. 

When I was younger I loved doing musicals and acting in front of audiences, but now getting up in front of a class I am not even in, a class no exchange, visiting or Eramus students are allowed to take, I feared I was going to be caught intruding on this class especially with my American accent. The instructor gives out directions, we get a five minute improve, and I think well, should I try to fake an Irish accent in an acting class? My palms are so sweaty, I know there is no way I am going to be able to fake an accent. I keep swallowing in intervals of two. 

It's my turn, the instructor is pointing at me. What the fuck was I doing, I missed the entire first row give their improves, I could have used one of those for inspiration and I have nothing. Now he is saying "Don't be shy" extremely loud. I know I must look like a deer in head lights, and I trip going down on the last two steps. I stand in front of my "peers" swallow two times and fake faint. The students gasp, I wait five seconds, Mississippillies included, jump to my feet, smile and bow. For some reason everyone laughs, and I am not discovered as an American intruder.